Three is a Crowd
Building an intimate relationship with God
The first time Stephen saw Sharon she was with her friends at his local church. Despite this, he could tell which of the ladies was for him. Sharon was beautiful no doubt. In addition, there was something very attractive about the “air of peace” that exudes from her face even from a distance.
While her friends chatted all the way, some rolling their eyes and laughing out really loud, Sharon simply watched in amusement and smiled cautiously in such an elegant manner. Stephen couldn’t just get his eyes off her. Every opportunity he had, he will stand afar and gaze upon this beauty.
It wasn’t too long that he realised he needed to go beyond gazing from afar. If he liked what he saw, then he needed to go after it, before other suitors will beat him to his game. But there was a challenge, Sharon was never alone. She was always flustered with friends. So one day, Stephen summed up the courage to approach the bevy of ladies knowing exactly who he was looking for. Coincidentally, there was a women’s programme happening the next month in the church, so Stephen took advantage of this opportunity to engage all the ladies about their attendance to this event. It was Stephen’s greatest delight when some of the ladies including Sharon signed up to attend the programme. Stephen knew his job was almost done, all he needed to do now, is to ensure he speaks to Sharon at this event.
Stephen and Sharon kicked off a relationship several months after the women’ s meeting. Stephen was excited about his new relationship. He finally got what he wanted. However, there was still a challenge. Sharon found it difficult to be on dates alone with Stephen. Whenever she and Stephen plan to meet, she will often come along with her friends. Initially this wasn’t an issue. Stephen needed to be friends first with all of Sharon’s friends to even have a conversation with her. But now that their relationship was growing, there was need to discuss more personal stuff. Stephen knew that his feelings towards Sharon was genuine. His commitment was a lifelong one hence the need to discuss about the future. But it was just impossible to have intimate conversations in the presence of other people.
One day, while at the usual group date with the ladies, Stephen asked Sharon to please step out of the room for a minute. Is anything wrong? asked Sharon, as she was taken aback by Stephen’s request. It was the first time he did that. Is there any reason you will like to see me alone? enquired Sharon. Yes! Stephen replied. I prefer to see you privately today.
Sharon reluctantly followed Stephen outside, while the other ladies rolled their eyes as they stirred mischievously at the duo. As soon as they got outside, Stephen spoke up. This time his eyes were red and his voice was shaky. Are you okay ? Sharon questioned. I am okay for now, but maybe not for too long replied Stephen. You see, we need to have more time alone. We have dated for six months now, but it still feels like we just met, and I still don’t know much about you. I am also pretty sure there is a lot about me, that you do not know as well. But…but we have been talking replied Sharon. I mean we all gist together as a group and we talk about our experiences from childhood till now. I recall, just last week you told us in the group about how you were kidnapped by some bandit in your first year in university and blind folded for weeks but miraculously you survived. You mentioned that it was your mum’s prayers that saved you. Stephen, I believe we talk a lot!
Stephen sighed deeply and spoke up. Did I mention to you that while I was in the captive of the bandit, I lost my left eye in a fierce fight while I attempted to escape? What! Oh my God! You mean you are blind in one eye? Like even right now? Yes I have been for several years replied Stephen. What! Oh my God I am so sorry. I honestly did not realise this, cried Sharon. Well, if you were observant you would have noticed that I try not to have conversation with people at my right side. That is why I always insist you sit at my left side so I can see you properly. Oh my God! I am sorry, I never noticed replied Sharon. You don’t have to be sorry dear, l can only say this to you because we are alone now. This is one of the reasons, we need to spend more time together. Deep secrets are never shared in public. By the way my biological mum died in a fire accident when I was ten. That was where I got this mark from. Stephen rolled up the sleeves of his shirt to the elbow region to reveal a huge burn scar.
Deep secrets are never shared in public.
Jesus!! screamed Sharon. You mean your mum is dead? Who then is “Nana'? Well, Nana adopted me, but she is absolutely amazing, replied Stephen. Sharon immediately hugged Stephen. I am so sorry about all these. I know now, there is a lot we need to know about each other. To be honest, I have a lot to share with you as well, but I am not comfortable to share in the presence of the ladies, for fear of been mocked. I agree now Stephen, that we have a lot to talk about and I think we can start now.
Would you like to go back to pick your bag so we can go somewhere quiet? asked Stephen. I am not picking my bag responded Sharon. I will send a text to one of the ladies to help bring my bag to my house later. Maybe the ladies will finally get the message today, that three is a Crowd.
Both Stephen and Sharon laughed out in excitement as they looked for a quiet place to talk.
When we give our lives to Jesus Christ, we are called into an intimate relationship. At first, we might experience him in the company of others (friends, family, pastors, church etc) as they support to ensure we are entrenched in the way and values of God. However, as our relationship grows in Christ, we will need to embrace alone moments where secret and intimate conversations can be shared.
The bible highlights many instances where our lord Jesus Christ retreated to quiet zones just to have an alone time with his father. In like manner, we also are called to do the same.
And after he had dismissed them, he went up a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone. Mat 14:23
Two key words in the scripture above, is “dismissed” and “alone”. Having an intimate relationship with God is a deliberate one. This means forsaking all others, including people & activities we love so much to be alone with him.
Do you have an “alone time” with Jesus regularly? If No, Schedule one today!